Monday, February 28, 2011

Human Alarm Clock

If left to his own devices, my husband would not wake up in a timely manner for things such as work and church. He simply doesn't hear the alarm. I have my theories about this: mainly that he knows I am there so he gives himself permission to not worry. Men are so good at that-I need to learn the same trick!

When I go out of town, not only does he turn up the volume on the alarm to ear-piercing levels, but he also sets the alarm on his phone and makes me call, too, regardless of the time zone I am in. Now, my biological clock actually wakes me up at the same time, every day, regardless of any other circumstance (such as it being a weekend, holiday, etc.) I am a morning person, not a night person. I have woken up at the same time for at least 15 years. No joke.

Here is what gets my goat: I am an insomniac. Even though I wake up super early, I can sometimes force myself back to sleep. If my husband thinks I am awake, he will try to snooze for a few more minutes, which means I have to stay awake to remind him a second time to get up. Lately this has been infuriating me! If I have to stay up, chances are good I won't be able to fall back asleep. I have found myself tersely demanding he get up and out at a speedy pace.

Anyone else find themselves responsible for someone else in this manner?

Thursday, February 24, 2011

True Love

True Love is when you continuously eat crackers/cookies/crunchy stuff that leaves crumbs on your spouse's side of the bed and they don't say a word about it!

Yup, I married a saint. What'd he get out of the deal? A shrew! Ha!

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Your Daily Laugh!

I have to watch this video at least once a year. It is so disgusting and hilarious at the same time! It never fails to amuse me. Poor Sandra Lee! I was thinking about it last night at 3 a.m. so I assure you it's good viewing.


Sunday, February 20, 2011

Don't!

Mr. Case always laughs because I have this mantra where I don't believe in saying negative things out loud. I always chide him with, 'Don't put that out into the universe!' As though somehow that might make it true? I'm not sure but I'm not into taking chances.

I learned a valuable lesson today: maybe it isn't so great to put good things out, either, say like bragging about the value of other people's marriages, unless you're prepared for a jinx. I guess I need to follow everything I say with a knock on wood?

I know, I know, that's utterly ridiculous. For tonight, I shall practice my real and true mantra:


Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, 
Courage to change the things I can, 
And wisdom to know the difference


For now, I am over today. I hope everyone had a good weekend.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

On Marriage

My parents have lived a lot of life in the close to 40 years they've been together (married 38 this September.) They have lived through the death of parents, ups and downs, their marriage survived having a child with cancer (no small feat, I assure you), significant financial gains and losses, etc. 

Obviously I am very proud that they are still married. Many people have quit through much less. and if I am to be honest, they have weathered some very, very rough storms. To say their marriage is imperfect is an understatement. But then, who does have the perfect marriage?

If I know one thing, it is this: whether they are on great terms or bad, they always go out on dates. Even when we were small, they'd sneak away for the weekend or at least go out to dinner. They made the time. I'm confident this is one of the sole reasons they survived. 

Mr. Case says he has not one memory of his parents ever going out alone, together. Not one. His parents are divorced. I wasn't part of their marriage so I can't say if this was a contributing factor but I do know I have an ingrained fear/presumption that couples who don't spend time together alone, run the risk of waking up one day not knowing who their spouse is anymore. What happens when your kids grow up to live their own lives? 

I am 29, my middle brother is 22 and my baby brother is 20. My parents still plot elaborate, detailed plans and schemes to find time without us. For instance, last night they had to make a run to "Wal-mart" when in reality they wanted to go out to dinner and didn't want any uninvited guests. This did not offend me in the least. 

Mr. Case and I promise one another on a weekly basis that we will never turn our heads and question when the last time we spent time alone, out of the house was. I know things will be changing in our near future, but I also know we have some control. I intend to exercise it. Sometimes an hour away for coffee can make a difference, ya know?

Friday, February 18, 2011

I Can't Help Myself...

Photo: olbroad.com
I'm on my way to Sonic to pick up a Red Velvet Cheesecake Blast. I make no apologies. It is almost 80 degrees here and humid. It is not even Spring yet so this is simply uncivilized. I'll be back...

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Target, You SUCK!

Long story short, in this state, toilet seat covers are a novelty. Meaning, you are lucky to find a public restroom with them. Now, as a germ-phobe, my first inclination is to "squat" anyway but that will be increasingly difficult in the near future. So, I ordered some toilet seat covers online from Target.com (they were not to be found in any stores!)

I had a gift card I wanted to use. After perusing the site, I learned that in case there is a discrepancy with your order, they require a credit card on file "for protection" in addition to taking your gift card info. I also learned that your card can be charged before the gift card is charged, but once the order is confirmed they will "right" any issues regarding charges. My gift card was sufficient to cover my purchase but I had no choice but to leave my credit card.

Well, no surprise here, they charged my credit card for the entire purchase and didn't use my gift card at all. I called the online customer service center where I was routed to India on a crackling line to speak with "Kishorna P." It's crappy enough that Target outsources, but the person they routed me to is basically a $h!t stain on society. She was rude, condescending and not helpful to say the least.

When I got my customer service survey to rate her service, I made sure to tell them as much. I also emailed their online customer service department to reiterate my feelings. Ya know, Wal-mart is constantly getting a bad rap for various things (some of which are justified, some not so much) but I will say this: when you call for customer service, you get to speak to someone in your own country and they don't treat you like garbage. I have been a loyal Target fan for many years but it seems like one problem after another with them. OK, rant over.


***Edit: Target responded to my complaints. They are willing to help me resolve the billing issue. For that, I give them credit. However, they fully admitted to outsourcing, and for the amount of time and trouble, I just don't feel it is worth my money or effort to continue shopping with them online.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Mental Note: It's Not the Last Supper

I have been binge eating all day.

I had a granola bar at about 7 a.m.

At 9 a.m. Mr. Case took me to Ihop where I had some eggs, meats, hash browns and 1 blintz-type thing. I didn't finish all the food, but still.

At 3 p.m. I had a candy bar (Thingamajig!)

At 4:30 p.m. I had a mini "slider" burger and a small chili cheese fries (which Mr. Case finished on my behalf.)

At 7:30 p.m. I had a meatball and a 1/2 cup of linguine.

I may or may not have just eaten a miniature peanut butter cup.

This gluttony must end!

Yum!

I love chocolate and these are, by far, two of the most delicious candy bars I've ever tasted:

Photo from coca-heaven.com
They don't have the Thingamajig in California but they do have the Whatchamacallit! Seriously, seek them out if you haven't already tried them!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Ah, Love

Yesterday marked the 4-year anniversary of the world's most epic marriage proposal. When we were discussing marriage, I told Mr. Case several times that I wanted a grandiose, memorable proposal. I know many women desire intimacy and privacy, but not me. I wanted over-the-top and Mr. Case delivered!

On February 14, 2007 Mr. Case professed his undying love for me over the radio on a popular Los Angeles station. The first words out of my mouth, sadly, were profanity because I was so shocked. Hey, I've come a long way and don't curse anymore, but I digress....

I was so stunned that I barely heard his proposal. I made him re-propose several more times so I could feel special. Thankfully, the radio station recorded it and sent us a copy for posterity.

A friend told me his proposal to his wife was intentionally low-key so he wouldn't have to top it year after year. That works for them but I can say with honesty that Mr. Case makes each Valentine's Day memorable.

I hope everybody had a fantastic day. We celebrated on Sunday with a special dinner at The Melting Pot. Last night we ate Golden Chick in bed because I didn't feel too great. Ah, romance, ha!

Here we are, at our wedding venue, shortly after getting engaged!

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Hope

Tonight my husband is going to take me to a romantic, sophisticated dinner to celebrate Valentine's Day early. Yesterday he surprised me with beautiful tulips.

But, it wasn't always that way.

I was one of the very last hold-outs to get married. In fact, most of my friends have all been married long enough to be in the baby-making business end of marriage.

Outside of my husband and one long-term relationship, I was single for many Valentine's celebrations. I was the certified Queen of the Lonely Hearts Club Band.

So for anyone out there that wants to vomit on February 14th, or who feels lonely, or who thinks their perfect match isn't out there, please take heed:

Your match is out there.

It might not be this year, it might not be next, but so long as you are emotionally available that person will find you. The best advice I ever got while single was, "Accept every single offer for a date. Even if the person is not your type, even if you're not attracted, accept. Worst case you have a fun diversion or you could meet a friend. And maybe you're meant to meet a friend of your new friend!"

Had I not kept an open mind, my husband would not have made it past the night we met. He was tenacious and went for what he wanted and I finally relented on the advice i just shared.

I hope this doesn't come across smug; really I just empathize with what it feels like to have no Valentine, when all you want is someone. I know what loneliness feels like and I know what it feels like to dread February 14th like The Plague.

Please never lose hope because sometimes it is all we have to get us to the next chapter.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Petula

Even though it is not sandal season and even though I am pregnant, I couldn't resist this show at Target. Those gift cards from my birthday were just burning a hole in my pocket! Not made for less than $30, I think! In fact, I just might wear them tonight....

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Not So Charming Charmin






www.charmin.com

www.coupangal.net















This post is not formatting well so my apologies in advance (this would never happen in Wordpress, right?)

Anyway! I love Charmin toilet paper. If I come to your house and you have cheap TP, I will notice! Charmin is literally the only brand I will buy, even after trying to make fiscal cutbacks and trying different brands; there's simply some things you don't skimp on!

The above two products in the Charmin brand are just plain awful. No, really. The "Sensitive" leaves a gooey trail behind. Their claim is that they leave a minimal amount of aloe/lotion on the skin to prevent chafing and to aid in case of sensitivity but no. Just, no. The product itself is deceiving-when you touch the TP it doesn't leave a residue but the second you wipe with it, all bets are off. Nasty goo!

And then there's the "Basic." Oh how I wanted to love it. Everything about it seemed perfect in theory: it was my favorite brand and it is economical. How could I not love it? Let's just say "basic" is an understatement. It's scratchy and thin. No bueno in the world of toilet paper. 

From here on out I will only use the "Ultra" or "Ultra Strong." I'm too scared to try the "Comfort." Toilet paper is a serious issue 'round these parts!

Edit: I didn't mean for this post to sound condescending. I know this brand is expensive. I don't really judge people for cheap TP. Please forgive me in advance if I need to use a little extra when I visit!



***Charmin does not know I am writing this review. I could only wish they'd send me some free toilet paper!


Monday, February 7, 2011

Romance, From the Inside

A few days ago Mr. Case came home very excited that he had a surprise for me!

I love surprises!

In the past, he has set out roses, balloons, etc. and I have been oblivious (usually after a long day at work when I come home and just want to plop on the couch.) He is forever chiding me that I don't notice his gestures of love. This is probably why he went out of his way to tell me I was getting a treat, rather than waiting for me to notice it on my own.

In perhaps the most obvious symbol that our marriage is evolving, I must share with you what the surprise was: a new toothbrush.

Friends, do not balk. My husband spoils me with the requisite flowers and trinkets, but this toothbrush was a sweeping gesture that proves Mr. Case really knows me. You see, I am somewhat obsessed with dental hygiene. When it is time for a new toothbrush I peruse the aisle for a good 20 minutes and usually leave feeling downright giddy over my new purchase. In this case, a dentist had sent someone to his job to advertise their services and everyone got to pick a new brush.

Mine is pink.

That, to me, is true love.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Super Bowl!

We are having a family party for the Super Bowl. A nice man from our marriage group at church invited us to another couple's house but we are shy and didn't follow up on it (he did ask if we were coming during church so I guess they really wanted us there-feels good!)

I feel like I am coming down with a sinus infection so I am not preparing my usual feast like I do when we entertain. Not many OTC's work for me do to my sensitivity to Pseudoephedrine so I am just trying to hydrate, hydrate, hydrate!

Anyway, on to the menu:

We ordered our wings from Wing Stop this year. We got mild, hot, terriyaki and BBQ
Pigs in a blanket
Spanokopita
Assorted mini quiche
Apple pie

As you can see, Costco is doing the catering for this event!  And yes, I am making an apple pie. I wanted a football-themed dessert and all I could think of was the "green" in Green Bay so I bought some green apples.

As for the brownies of days prior, well, they didn't materialize. I didn't have enough butter so I ended up baking a cake, instead. It turned out gross. I'm beginning to get concerned because baking is pretty much my only talent and I don't know what I will do if I lose it. Just kidding, I'm also good at folding laundry.

Nobody Likes An Emo Kid

Well, yesterday was rough! Sorry for all that verbal diarrhea, I just had to get it all out.

And then something amazing happened-when we went to church, it was as though the entire sermon had been written for me.

The sermon was about how we allow our minds to work, how we combat negativity, what is expected behavior from a Christian, etc. I'm not paraphrasing very eloquently so forgive me, but know that the pastor hit a home run with his message to me.

I walked away feeling revitalized and confident that I could modify my behavior to make it not only easier on myself, but easier on others. And most importantly, pleasing to God.

I'm off the pity pot.

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Emotional Hangover

***Warning, this post contains profanity***

I had a really nice day-I ran some errands with my parents and they treated me to a nice lunch. Then, when we got home, one of my brothers went off on me because I commented on nobody clearing the snow (my dad who hurt his back really badly, was trying to do it.)

Actually, to say he went off on me is an epic understatement. He totally raged.

Nothing new there, unfortunately.

For what it is worth, I never yell back. I get called every name and profanity in the book. For reasons I won't get into, a culture has developed in my family where this particular family member is never put in their place because everyone is afraid of upsetting them. Obviously the fear stems from this person being emotionally unstable.

For my part, I don't put him in his place because 1. I don't think that is my place in life to do to other people and 2. It is ineffective and I don't like to waste my time. I pretty much just sit there and take it.

Maybe if I had more self-respect I would stick up for myself? I promise I'm no martyr, this is how it is with most every family member when dealing with this person. My dad not so much but he is the first one to come under attack so I don't like to have him do my bidding for me.

Upon hearing the commotion my dad asks what happens and my mom responds, "It's my baby boy again." Like, really mom? You need to use a pet name/term of endearment to describe someone who just verbally abused me? Somehow I got on her "Enabler Train" and let my life be consumed with this person and his problems, and now (especially since I am pregnant) I am tired. I'm just over it. Time to focus on my own life and my own family. I admit it is very painful and difficult for me to accept that her entire focus is on him, good or bad. It is no secret that he is her favorite, and she used to be much better about concealing it. Now, she is consumed by him. I start buying into it, too. Enough is enough. I actually never had a problem with her favoritism (my thinking is, different kids, different personalities so it is reasonable she might feel closer to one or get along better with one. No harm, no foul.) I never, ever, begrudge either of my siblings anything so when I say it never bothered me before, I mean it sincerely. In this stage of my life, I am beginning to feel disgusted by it.

Instead of letting my resentment get the best of me, I'm just going to try to distance myself. I have always said that you can't expect more from people than what they are capable of giving. At some point I must acknowledge that I am setting myself up for disappointment; it isn't fair to me or to her to place expectations.

Well, this started off being about a sibling and now it is about a parent. I need to dig deep within myself to see what of it I need to own and what of it I don't. I have this tendency to own other people's crap. Even after my brother accosted me, I still mulled over in my head what I could've done to change it, my role, etc. My mind automatically spirals to, 'Well, the weather is bad he could be in an accident and then that will have been your last conversation.' Like, really? These are not hormonal irrationalities, these are normal for me. I can promise you he didn't drive off thinking, "Gosh, there could be an accident and the last thing I would have said to my sister is you're a FUCKING BITCH!" It takes two people to fight and I definitely accept what I did to anger him, but as I said, I don't stoop to his level.

Bottom line: I need to make some serious changes, even if it means eating Top Ramen for the next 3 years. You can't put a price on your sanity.

Friday, February 4, 2011

You Might Be A Redneck If...

You are pregnant, wearing mis-matched clothing, driving a monster truck while pulling the male members of your house on a snowboard attached with a rope, through an empty field and down the streets of your neighborhood.  

Hey, there isn't much to do when you're snowed in!

Brownies Are Serious Business

I made a pineapple cake this week with a pineapple-coconut glaze.

It wasn't very good-too sugary and sweet.

This morning I told my dad, 'Well, that cake was so gross so this feels like it is an urgent brownie situation.'

I got busy and forgot about till I received this text from Dear Old Dad:

"Don't be an brownie Indian promise giver."

Miscellaneous

I was farting around on the internet while using my lap desk. I called my baby brother into the room to see the snow piling up against the window. Dustin followed him in. Upon seeing my lap desk, he asks, "Is that your web cam?" Confused I asked, 'Is what my web cam?' My brother must speak Idiot because he burst out laughing and said, "That's a little reading lamp!" It honestly took me a minute to register what was going on. Good grief.

This is my lap desk, for reference.

My brother then remarked, "Your hair looks really pretty." Suspicious of such a compliment I inquired what was wrong with my hair. Mind you, I fully admit to not having showered. We are iced in and can't leave the house so incentive to change out of PJ's is low. Anyway, my brother then tells me he thought I was doing my best Edward Scissorhands impression. Lovely. 

I had something else mildly amusing but the pregnancy brain has caused a short-fire in the circuitry around here.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

One (Of Many) Reasons I Married Him

Tonight my brother was getting off of work late and because his car had broken down, someone needed to pick him up. This would mean somebody would have to venture out into a "freeze" (AKA ice storm) where it feels like -3 degrees with windchill, to pick him up.

I asked why he was going to get him and he replied, "There is no way I'd want your parents going out in this type of weather."

He is such a wonderful man, that Mr. Case!